Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Nov 11, 2010 17:48:36 GMT -5
Magnus offers no resistance in spite of his dismay at Perceptor's abrupt shift in mood; he doesn't even sigh. He sits there silently – meekly even – though the urge to slap Perceptor with the hand that seems to so grossly offend him grows stronger with every second that he glares at it.
"Of course," he mutters, the tremor in his voice belying his deliberately bland expression. First Mirage, now Perceptor. The only Autobot he's had any significant time with today who hasn't been angry with him was Emirate Xaaron, and Xaaron was still frustrated and aghast – and at least Magnus knew why Mirage was angry. He makes a point of watching Perceptor's every move while the scientist works.
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Post by Perceptor on Nov 13, 2010 6:25:04 GMT -5
Perceptor's glare doesn't abate, even as he works, but his hands are gentle and careful, despite the thunderous expression governing his face. Little by little, though, it fades, leaving weariness in the wake of past anger, until, with a sigh, Perceptor snaps the last repaired phalange strut back into place and welds the thin digital armor back into place.
"I am sorry, Ultra Magnus," he finally offers as he turns away to replace the metal working tools and move the cart out of the way. "I had no right to inflict my frustration upon you."
He turns back suddenly, his brow ridges drawn together pensively. "Do you think that I am too trusting?"
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Nov 16, 2010 13:04:05 GMT -5
"Are you… what?" Magnus turns a bemused look on Perceptor, irritation waning in the face of surprise. "Too trusting?" he echoes. He falls silent and stares; he hasn't associated much with Perceptor since his arrival – Perceptor has been busy and Magnus has been too reticent to really seek out anyone – so he has to stop and think on the question.
There are many things he could say of this Perceptor, and all of them comparisons against the one he knows. But too trusting?
"I'm not terribly familiar with you," he pronounces slowly, "so… it's difficult to make an honest evaluation." He holds up one hand in a stopping gesture to forestall the disappointed denouement he envisions Perceptor mustering right now. "But what I have seen, I can explain," he says, setting his hand down. "From what I've seen, you tend to let your emotions get the better of you. I notice if only because it's… unlike the Perceptor I'm used to." The scientist in Magnus's reality was certainly not frigid – Shockwave has that market cornered – but Perceptor tended to keep his feelings under a cool, calculating lid with occasional slips every few hundred thousand years or so. "And this is just a guess," Magnus goes on, "but I'm willing to venture that you get too involved in situations. And you do trust, rather deeply." Now he heaves a shallow sigh. "Do I think you're too trusting? No. Holi is too trusting. Clipper is too trusting." They trust him unquestioningly, for one. "But I think that your trust combined with everything else could be problematic."
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Post by Perceptor on Nov 24, 2010 19:23:48 GMT -5
Perceptor watches him intently as Magnus rumbles through his explanation, his own expression quieting and going very still. He is silent for long moments after the larger mech goes silent, before nodding. Just one, curt, stuff nod and a very quiet murmur of thanks.
He gathers his tools and begins popping open panels to access Magnus's systems, working in silence for several long minutes. The sound of his processor thinking hard is almost a palpable thing in the quiet lab.
"Mirage thinks that I cheapen trust by offering it as easily as I do," he finally observes very softly.
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Nov 25, 2010 19:37:23 GMT -5
Mentioning the spy nearly ruins Perceptor's work because Magnus twitches almost from head to toe. The hand Perceptor just finished repairing clenches tightly and Magnus scowls at the far wall.
"Mirage," he growls with renewed spite. "Ignore him. Anyone who can spout the same rhetoric as Shockwave with a straight face has no room to talk about trust."
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Post by Perceptor on Nov 28, 2010 13:42:42 GMT -5
Now that confuses Perceptor greatly. He may be angry at Mirage, and confused by him (and feeling more than a little guilty for being angry and confused and having said what he'd said, on top of it all), but...
"'Spout the same rhetoric as Shockwave'?" he asks, perplexed?
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Nov 28, 2010 19:21:59 GMT -5
"He told me," Magnus growls and those newly-repaired struts audibly ping and strain, "that everything I've lived through – my past – is just a remote possibility that may never be for him. That because there's only a small chance of it happening, I have no right to feel as I do about the things I've witnessed and experienced. But I can still be held accountable for things that, by his logic, are just as unlikely a future as his actions." It may not be the exact words either of them used, but that is the message Magnus took from it – that he is to blame for things not yet come to pass while Shockwave and Mirage are absolved by the very same circumstances.
Magnus's uninjured hand clenches into a fist and his arm jerks out; he punches the wall, leaving an impact crater.
"Both of them," he snarls. His too-bright scarlet optics focus on Perceptor.
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Post by Perceptor on Nov 29, 2010 13:24:53 GMT -5
Perceptor frowns, attempting to find the logic in that explanation. It makes no sense to him. At all. How can events that have not occurred for one individual still be blamed upon one who has lived them, but that individual who has lived those events not have the right to be affected by those very events? That's... the most circuitous form of scapegoating that he's ever encount--
"Magnus!" he exclaims as the larger mech punches the wall. He doesn't care about the damage to the wall, but, rather, to whatever Magnus may have just done to that fist as well! He grabs for that hand and begins inspecting it for damage, utterly unphased by the potential risk to himself by another possible outburst of temper. "I must insist that you restrain any further outbursts, please! It is quite distressing to watch you inflict such pointless damage upon yourself!"
He takes a few calming vents and pulls his gaze back up to Magnus's face, still retaining his grasp upon that hand. "I believe that I can begin to fathom some of your frustration, Ultra Magnus. However, continued self-mutilation is not the appropriate response."
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Dec 5, 2010 12:53:48 GMT -5
And once again, Magnus loses a hand to Perceptor. At this rate, the scientist should probably propose and get it over with before people start talking. Still tense, still angry, Magnus nearly does strike Perceptor with that very same hand. It's the slow inspection of his knuckles and fingers that dulls his rage. He blinks at Perceptor once, twice, shoulders slowly sagging as he relaxes. It isn't long before he's back to simply ignoring his hand while Perceptor examines it, as though it isn't even attached to him.
"It takes more than punching a bulkhead to hurt me," he says quietly. So much more… yet so little as a few carelessly-thrown words. Is it really that easy to get to him? He frowns at the hand Perceptor just finished repairing, flexing his fingers, then making a fist and relaxing it. He knows there was a time he had a steadier head. Why does it bother him so much now?
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Post by Perceptor on Dec 9, 2010 20:30:40 GMT -5
Losing a hand to Perceptor makes it sound like the scientist is some sort of disease. "Oh, don't worry about him. He just has a case of the Perceptor. As soon as he eats his thesaurus and a little corrostop, he'll be fine."
But that's neither here nor there.
"Perhaps it does, Ultra Magnus," Perceptor replies tightly as he buffs out the scuffs to those knuckles, "however, such continued lack of awareness of the damages you inflict upon yourself can only lead to something more debilitating." Perceptor heaves a sigh and finally releases Magnus's hand, fixing the white mech with a discontented, penetrating frown.
"The words of others only have effect if you allow them."
That had been what he'd been trying to explain to Glyph down in the motorpool bay on Pz-Zazz. He hadn't been totally unaware of the motives of the others who had been gathered there. He'd simply... pushed it out of mind. He's grown quite accustomed to being sneered at, mocked or derided for his intelligence and his lack of physical prowess. Used to being cut short, sighed at impatiently, never allowed to finish his thoughts, made fun of for his vocabulary. If he hadn't long ago resigned himself to such emotional and intellectual abuse, he'd have gone mad and taken himself offline long, long ago.
He has not quite managed to get to the point where it no longer hurts... because it does, deep inside, but it improves with every cycle, and he can ignore the irritation for what it is: an irritant and not a wound.
Usually.
"To be denied the right to be affected by the events which have shaped one's life is to deny the lessons one may have learned as well. To trivialize the pain, and also the joys, thus experienced. No one has the right to do that to another." He is very confused, too, by the thought of Mirage doing that... but he is fond of the spy. Even now when he is so very angry at him.
"We are more than the sums of our experiences, though, for it is how we react to those experiences that define who we are. Not the words of another, no matter how hurtful they may be, or may have been intended to be. Only you can determine what words will strike true, Magnus."
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Dec 11, 2010 13:35:17 GMT -5
"Thank you, Perceptor," murmurs Magnus. Sadly enough, given the counsel Perceptor tries to provide, the scientist's words are the words that fail to reach him through the tumult of emotions rolling through his spark. He means his thanks sincerely nevertheless, for he knows Perceptor means well and is trying to help.
Once Perceptor finishes with his hand – and he feels guilty for taking up time with cosmetic issues – he lets it rest on the berth and stifles a sigh.
"Shouldn't we finish this examination before Xaaron nags us both to death?" he wonders with the palest ghost of a smirk tugging at the corners of his optics.
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Post by Perceptor on Dec 13, 2010 12:55:29 GMT -5
Perceptor sighs, guessing that his words have, as usual, gone right over the intended recipient's head. He doesn't even know how to state himself more clearly than he had; he should be used to an Ultra Magnus blowing him off by now. Magnus had been the one with the least patience for his dissertations and explanations in recent years. Why should this one be any different?
"I'm growing inured to Xaaron's nagging," he sighs, disheartened, turning away to replace his tools and gather different ones for the systems inspection. "However, the sooner completed, the sooner you can be free of yet more time here. There are, I imagine, more pleasant locations to spend one's time than being stuck forever in one medical unit or another."
Well, for Magnus, at least. Although, Perceptor does prefer his laboratory and his projects to the medbay, it's close enough to his current lab facility to be comforting to him. With little more preamble than that, he connects the scanner and monitor he will need to fully examine Magnus's various systems and complete coding, and begins the tedious task of crawling through it, line by line and connection by connection.
ooc: feel free to time skip as much as you'd like. Perceptor will continue with whatever small talk Magnus initiates, however, he's not likely to initiate any of his own right now, and will concentrate on the exam.
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Dec 14, 2010 21:00:48 GMT -5
And once again, Ultra Magnus seems to have failed an Autobot. Perceptor's dejected response earns a tired look from Magnus and he, too, falls quiet. He doesn't even bother running any tactical routines to pass the time, just in case they might interfere with the scans; he simply stares at the wall, unwilling to talk further since he's already upset the scientist.
It gives him time to find his patience again.
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Post by Perceptor on Dec 18, 2010 22:47:22 GMT -5
Ironically, Perceptor is unwilling to break the silence - intentionally - for fear of upsetting Ultra Magnus with any more complicated discussion. He doesn't quite manage, however, to quell his habit of making small remarks to his tools or the individual circuit he is studying, cajoling them to reveal their secrets, or commenting about the tiny flecks of corrosion he cleans off as he inches his way through Magnus' systems.
An unexpected bit of code popping up, though, catches his attention sharply, and he pauses to scan more thoroughly through a particular batch of circuits with a low, indecipherable murmur.
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Ultra Magnus
Major
Disappointing Fellow Autobots Since the Age of Internment
Posts: 565
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Post by Ultra Magnus on Dec 20, 2010 14:07:41 GMT -5
The quiet running commentary Perceptor makes – at his internals? – turns into a sort of white noise after a while; Magnus stops trying to follow what Perceptor says and just lets it buzz past his audio receptors. Largely, the one-sided conversation doesn't seem meant for him anyway.
A disruption in that steady stream of movement and sound is as attention-getting as a shout. Magnus rouses from his funk and turns to watch Perceptor, slightly baffled.
"Hn?"
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