The Gun, the Con, and the Wardrobe

[Victoria Raines]

Day 10, Ship, Semi Private

---

Shockwave can understand when someone is not prompt in reporting as requested. He truly can. Sometimes, the requested individual is in the middle of a delicate situation, or a battle, or laid out on Hook's table after making the mistake of insulting Mixmaster's brewing. So the gunformer will sometimes forgive is flock such a transgression.

He will not forgive the transgression when he has been ignored for a handful of hours. Most certainly when that handful is closer to a full day.

It is only because he was attending to business planetside that he has not sought out Swindle before now. However, that business is done, and Shockwave can turn his attention to other, more personal business.

Like reminding the conman that he is a member of the Decepticon Army, not a camp follower who can ignore command on a whim.

He does not knock when he comes to the room he has been told Swindle should be. He merely enters, stepping softly up behind the conman.

"Swindle, " Shockwave says, voice low, "I was not aware you had a masochistic bent."

[Swindle]

The room Swindle has taken for his own is cluttered, and that's putting it mildly. Weapons and components litter most of the available space. The rest is filled with schematics, stray datapads and discs, and video editing equipment. Swindle is currently bent over something that appears to be shaping up to be a rocket with a chainsaw in place of a warhead. A large mug full of steaming hot oil sits by his right hand.

When Shockwave starts talking right behind him Swindle starts, his left optic twitching as he spins around, revealing deep bags under his eyes that indicate he hasn't defragged lately. "Shockwave! I mean Lord Shockwave! So sorry! I got your call but I was working with two sub-critical masses of fissionables and I figured I'd get going as soon as I was done and one thing led to another and so. . .hey, here we are!" He smiles a big smile, his right cheek twitching, and slugs back some oil, slamming the mug down on the counter. "What can I do for you, sir?"

[Victoria Raines]

Shockwave stares impassively down at Swindle as the conman babbles out his excuses.

"And you could not stop to let me know this several hours ago, when I first hailed you? Or any of the subsequent times after?" His voice is still low and even, patient.

He tilts his head, "You are not taking proper care of yourself, Swindle. I think I must intervene and pry you from your work, enforce a bit of rest."

Shockwave's hand comes up, and he tries to place a finger under Swindle's chin and tilt it up, painfully up, past the point of comfortable extension.

"We have unfinished business to discuss."

[Swindle]

Swindle's smile continues to twitch, but he knows better than to resist when Shockwave touches him. Even what he's heard of his own universe's Shockwave is pretty scary, and by all accounts this one is worse. "Eheh, right you are, sir. What did you have in mind?"

[Victoria Raines]

Take heart Swindle. It was just Shockwave's finger at your throat, not one of those razor-tipped needles he often uses to punctuate such gestures.

"I wish to get a closer look at your chest. The schematics only tell so much." Shockwave lets Swindle's head drop, and steps away. "Now, secure anything volatile. While we are on the way to my labs, we can discuss exactly who gave you permission to take over this area as a workspace."

Once Swindle has complied (as he better, and in a timely manner), Shockwave heads back out of the workroom. He fully expects Swindle to follow.

[Swindle]

Swindle lets out a sigh of relief as his head is released. "Right you are, sir! I'll get right on that!" Swindle scurries about the room, hurriedly saving his work on the consoles, shutting off equipment, and tightening the clamps holding half-assembled weapons in place before rushing out into the corridor, pausing only to triple code-lock and booby-trap the door, rushing to keep up with Shockwave.

"The thing about that is, sir, it was a spare parts storeroom, only about half-full? And there was another storeroom that was also only partially full, so I just consolidated! This is a much more efficient use of space!" There's a pause, during which Swindle waits for Shockwave to say or do something horrific to him. No Decepticon leader can honestly be that quiet and composed. He must have overpowering rage bubbling just below the surface, right? "Did I mention I've got a plan in the works to smuggle Frenzy onto the Event Horizon?"

[Victoria Raines]

Shockwave has actually had more moments of lost composure since his displacement than ever he had prior. If his current demeanor worries Swindle, what might the con man think of Shockwave in full on diplomatic mode?

"Efficient. Of course. And you did not think that perhaps there was reason for items to be stored as they were, or a reason why we have kept our labs and workstations within a certain area?"

"Swindle," Shockwave pauses in his stride and looks over his shoulder, "I can be quite the generous leader; I will not deny you the workspace provided you take proper precautions." Shockwave's optic flickers. "But from now on, ask first."

They come in short order to Shockwave's private labs. He enters the key code, and once in, gestures at a work table.

"That will do. Now. Tell me about this plan of yours."

[Swindle]

Swindle considers making excuses about how he's not used to having to ask permission to do things, but decides not to. He just says "Yes sir," in a muted tone as he dies a little inside. Following Shockwave into the lab, he climbs reluctantly onto the exam table, huge purple eyes scanning the room for anything that looks painful.

"Well, there's a Junkion named Pee-Dee that's hooked up with the Autobots. I'm selling her a gun that shoots chainsaws. And before you object to me selling weapons to the enemy, let me just say that aside from the ludicrous concept itself, the chainsaws shouldn't be able to hurt anyone on our side, unless one of the Nebulans gets caught without his armor. Anyway, the ammunition is the right size for Frenzy to scan as a disguise. She ought to carry him right onto the ship for us." The merchant fails to add "Do you love it?" but then he is very tired.

[Victoria Raines]

So Shockwave is responsible for Swindle having a little death? Kinky!

The lab is quite orderly, a place for everything and everything in its place. There are a few other worktables, most with various components and supplies laid upon them. One wall is dominated by a large monitor that is flanked by smaller monitors, but the controls seem to be located elsewhere. The far end of the lab is made up of cabinets and storage drawers.

There is a tray of instruments next to the table upon which Swindle rests, just the normal things one would expect for a standard repair or upgrade session, nothing particularly scary.

Shockwave pulls a datapad from subspace and punches in a code. The monitors flicker to life, some of the smaller ones showing choice bits of Swindle's schematics. They are juxtaposed with information on the transwarp tech that the con man had provided plus transwarp research from Shockwave's own reality.

"A gun. That shoots chainsaws," Shockwave says, touching the datapad again. One image in the schematics zooms into close focus, "How decidedly impractical. I would recommend not showing it to Screwdriver."

"I believe I have isolated the appropriate place to tie into your systems. I prefer to keep a constant stream of data when I am working on a live subject, to guard against a surprise systems failure. Now, lie back on the table, please, and I shall get you hooked up."

Shockwave watches Swindle as he waits for the gunformer to comply. He waits until Swindle is almost settled and then he speaks, voice still so soft and even.

"Do I worry you, Swindle?"

[Swindle]

Swindle hates himself for kowtowing to Shockwave. He isn't even getting paid. But the alternative is trying to escape and strike out on his own, and he doesn't like his odds on that, hence the dying inside.

He lies back on the table, a panel opening on his chest to reveal a series of interface ports. Be gentle, Shockwave, it's his first time. He turns his head to stare into the gunformer's optic when asked if he's worried by him. "Honestly? Yes. You're unsettling. I'm used to dealing with clients on the other end of a vidphone. Because people who want to buy lots of things that go boom in order to take over the universe tend to be . . . a bit unstable. I don't know if you ever met your universe's Megatron, but if he's anything like mine, you know what I'm talking about. You? You're stable. Reasonable, even. I mean, here we are, in orbit around the same planet as the 'Bots, and you're letting me do business instead of throwing everything at them or concocting some grand scheme to annihilate them utterly and their little cyber-dog too (muahaha). You're the opposite of what I expect in a warlord, and it's going to take some getting used to."

[Victoria Raines]

Swindle is paid- paid in energon and housing, in the having of a safe haven. He is paid in having associates who will assist him should he run into trouble, and in having a commander who allows him much more freedom than might be expected.

Shockwave slides a few cables out of the datapad and hooks them into Swindle. The gunformer's touch is actually gentle- well, gentle compared to a Constructicon's. Swindle has only irked Shockwave, not truly angered him, and so hasn't earned any actual pain. Yet.

Shockwave does, however, have a punishment in mind. Oh yes.

Data begins streaming across the larger monitor as Shockwave speaks. "I was one of the first of my Megatron's Decepticons, Swindle. I watched him become warped with a desire for power, consumed with his rivalry with Optimus Prime. I know not what happened between them at their first meeting. But it changed Megatron."

"While he was never 'stable', I would say that he was quite mad from shortly thereafter. He never considered what was the better path, the most logical for our people and our planet." Shockwave's voice grows a shade flat as he speaks of his Megatron. Almost bitter.

"But he is dead, now. By my hand."

He turns to examine the data. "Have you always had such storage capabilities, or did you bargain for it in your travels?"

[Swindle]

Swindle nods, the conversation relaxing him despite the invasive procedure. Shockwave's bedside manner is refreshingly pleasant. "Exactly. You've gotta concentrate on your bottom line. Can't get carried away trying to drive the other guy out of business." Swindle files away the information that Shockwave killed Megatron for later, when he has time to be properly awed and terrified. Then again, if Shockwave wanted him offline, he'd already have been recycled. "I came online with my storage dimension. Most people from my reality have their own personal modification. Lugnut has his punch, Blitzwing has his cannons, that sort of thing." He neglects to mention that he also has versions of these weapons in his compartment. If Shockwave goes poking around he'll likely find that out for himself.

[Victoria Raines]

"Hmm, and like Blackarachnia's ability stealing. You universe is comprised of unique snowflakes, it seems."

Shockwave makes a few notations, then sets down his datapad. He tries to rest his hand on Swindle's chest. He's not trying to open Pandora's box just yet; but Shockwave has always been very hands on when give a new subject to explore. Plus, he knows that touch, proximity, they can be very unnerving things.

And he likes that he has unnerved the smooth conman, yes.

"And what limits have you found to your storage space in your young life?"

For Shockwave is fairly sure that Swindle is quite young, in comparison to himself.

[Swindle]

So they're just going to talk for a while? Did Swindle really need to lie down on a table for this? "We're not all completely unique. Bots that share a protoform mold tend to be similar in shape, and occasionally in abilities, though there are exceptions. Autobot troopers and medics share a mold, but have different abilities."

Then Shockwave gets to the matter at hand. "Well, the interior is about the size of a large warehouse, and the portal in warps space so I can fit things in that are larger than the opening. Also I can locate and pull stuff out pretty much by instinct. Other than that. . ." He shrugs. "I've never really thought too much about it. It's just a part of me. Do you know how all your parts work?" Swindle pauses. "Okay, so you probably know, but most bots don't."

[Victoria Raines]

Swindle is on the table because it enforces his subservient position. Shockwave will get to the more invasive examination in his own good time.

"I actually do know how all my parts work. I am actually quite puzzled by someone who does not. Even if they do not understand them, everyone has their base schematics and original specs on file. So this idea of abilities without explanation-" Shockwave's fingers flex on Swindle's chest, "-is rather vexing."

In other words, Shockwave will take you apart if he can't find the answer any other way. Let's hope that isn't necessary here.

"You mentioned transwarp technology before?" He leaves the question open-ended- and he expects extrapolation.