"Awww." Pee-Dee was already reaching over to take off an arm, too. "I hate it when you guys know us well enough to not use that phrase."
Because it's funny to offer your arm to someone.
"How much are we talking in terms of 'a lot of money'? In shanix, please, since no one else around here deals in energon credits." Pee-Dee flips open the menu, then leans forward to rest her elbows on the table. "I presume, because of the whole Sharks vs. Jets thing, that you're going to do something to both fleece me of a lot of money and screw with my weapon. Not a big deal since it's what the script calls for. But, you know, the script might call for a returning guest-star if whatever you do doesn't screw with the functionality of my 'launcher."
"I would never cheat a customer! I'm shocked at the implication!" Swindle says with a straight face, despite all the evidence to the contrary, "Regardless of what the script called for. As to the shanix. . . ten thousand, all in advance."1 Swindle waits to see if Pee-Dee catches the reference, because two can play at this game. "And what exactly do you mean by a 'returning guest star?' Is it anything like a repeat customer?"
1. Star Wars: A New Hope
Last Edit: Mar 22, 2010 19:28:57 GMT -5 by Swindle
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Swindle pounds one purple fist on the table and says in his angriest voice, drawing stares from nearby tables, "But who's going to drive it, dollface? You?,"1 smiling all the while.
The waitress approaches and gives the two robots a look. "Er, is this a bad time?" Swindle looks up, smiles, and responds "Not at all. To start off with I'll have a dish of silicon sticks with some mercury for dipping, and for the main course I'll have the '76 Chateau d'Hydrocarbon with a diesel twist and just a pinch of methanol, shaken, not stirred. And put a cocktail umbrella in it." He then turns back to Pee-Dee whilst the waitress writes that all down.
1. More Star Wars
Last Edit: Mar 22, 2010 19:41:27 GMT -5 by Swindle
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
"You bet I could. I'm not such a bad driver myself! I don't have to sit here and listen to this-"1
Fortunately, the waitress interrupts before Pee-Dee has to switch roles over to Ben Kenobi. And look, someone has finally brought her a proper chair to sit in!
"I'd like the arsenic dainties, please. For the main course..." She points at a particular item on the menu. "The '77 Scorned Woman Avgas sounds neat. Can you put some iron shaving on the top?"
The waitress gives Pee-Dee's wheels a long look. "Ma'am, avgas drinks are designed for flight-capable mechanoids."
"I know." She's a Junkion. If she worried about optimized fuel, she'd never get anything done.
"... Right. Your appetizers will be along shortly."
---
1. More Star Wars.
Just a soul with an innocent face/A regular girl dressed in blue.
Swindle picks up more or less where they left off, skipping the parts that don't involve money. "So, shall we say two thousand now, and the rest when we reach Ald-" He shakes his head vigorously, as though to dislodge something, "-the rest on delivery? For a total of seventeen?"
Swindle then gets up from his seat and walks around the table to pull out the new chair for Pee-Dee.
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Swindle smiles back at Pee-Dee before crossing back over to sit in his own chair. "I hope not," he says. "If Starscream has any princesses lying around, he can keep them. . . But I'm pretty sure he doesn't have any. I think we would have heard the screaming by now. There's not much of a market for princesses these days anyway."
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Swindle grins. "If 'Chief' Kup could do Shockwave too while he's at it, that'd be keen. Don't get me wrong, they're both swell guys, but just not CEO material. Why take over the universe when you can buy it? Anyway, I'm glad we have an accord. I'll make a note of the price. You'll be wanting it in rust reds and beiges, I assume?" Swindle leans forward across the table and offers his hand to the Junkion to shake on the deal.
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Pee-Dee smiles at Swindle, showing all of her shiny sawblade teeth. "As long as it doesn't cost extra."
Then she takes his hand to shake. The handshake isn't too vigorous, but getting your hand ripped off at the dinner table always puts people off their meal.
"This looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship."1
---
1. Casablanca
Just a soul with an innocent face/A regular girl dressed in blue.
"I couldn't agree more," Swindle says, shaking hands, then pulling a datapad from his chest compartment and making a note. "For what you're paying already, the custom paint job is free."
At around this time, the waitress arrives with their appetizers, along with complimentary glasses of coolant. Nothing gets efficient service quite like bribing the help. Swindle raises his glass in a toast. "To business." 1
1. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Swindle tilts back the coolant, drinking half the glass before replacing it on the table. "Just the thing to cleanse the chemosensors before a meal." He smiles back at Pee-Dee. "I like it too. There's a version of it back in my home reality. I've made some good deals there." He then dips a silicon stick in his dish of mercury and munches on it thoughtfully, purple optics wandering over toward the karaoke stage.
If there's a sucker born every minute. . . let's see, sixty minutes in an hour, times twenty-four hours in a day . . . I'm gonna be RICH.
Pee-Dee bites an arsenic dainty in half, letting the grey innards threaten to ooze out onto her dress. So she licks them up with a slinky, rust-colored tentacle that slips back inside her mouth and into a hatch when she's done.
Junkions are weird, man.
"There's no place like home," Pee-Dee says thoughtfully, clicking her heels together. "But maybe there is here."
Just a soul with an innocent face/A regular girl dressed in blue.