Kup Speaks With Not-Xaaron

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

Emirate Xaaron shrieks when Kup finishes and curls up, holding himself. He mutters to himself over and over again, "Nonono."

Swerve can't do that, he just can't! Swerve is so good, so normal, a lone sane man in an insane world. He's what Autobots could be, if only they'd give up their blood thirst and their cruelty. Yet, all things can fade, and the Prime could break even Swerve, and he would. Knowing that Swerve fell from grace because of Emirate Xaaron is something he simply could not bear.

Oh, Kup wants Emirate Xaaron to actually do something about this? What can he do? When Swerve gets determined, he... Emirate Xaaron owes it to Swerve to at least try. Emirate Xaaron uncurls miserably and sighs heavily, mumbling, "I'll try."

[Swerve-3]

Shrieks are not part of what Swerve finds normal conversation. Or even grave conversation. To the Pit with standing quietly in the corridor after that sound. He shoves the door open and he's a full two steps back into the room almost before he has the commands run and while he hasn't drawn his cannon, he has his tonfas and he's ready to fight if he must.

He stops, though, and frowns. He wasn't expecting to see quite so much distance between Emirate Xaaron and Kup.

"…Just what's going on in here?" he demands, frowning and looking suspiciously to the security chief.

[Kup]

Kup is, indeed, a fair distance from Emirate Xaaron. He is still leaning against the wall, next to the doorway, and his arms are still crossed. It should be fairly certain that he's not touched the Emirate.

He doesn't answer Swerve's question, but looks directly into Swerve's frown, expression slightly sad but clear. The steady gaze of the innocent man. After that gaze is held for a moment, long enough for the point to become clear, he looks down at Emirate Xaaron.

This is a question best answered by the silver and gold robot.

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

Emirate Xaaron looks utterly embarrassed when Swerve comes back in, and he pushes himself off the berth and stands shakily, darting closer to Swerve, almost close enough to touch, He clasps his hands before him beseechingly and stutters, "Kup and I were just discussing, just discussing what you and I would have done if we hadn't found that portal, and he said, eh-heh, he said that you would have offered yourself up to Rodimus Prime to distract him. You wouldn't do that, would you?"

He closes the gap even more, perhaps uncomfortably close, and he asks in the way of people who really don't want to hear the answer, "You wouldn't, right? I mean, Swerve, he wouldn't kill you. He'd... make you one of them, just to see purity corrode, and it would be all my fault. Do you think I could live that on my hands?"

[Swerve-3]

Swerve, frown wavering in confusion, holds Kup's stare for that interval while the situation sinks in, then mimics the veteran by turning to Emirate Xaaron.

"…Sir?" he ventures hesitantly. Speech leaves him entirely when Emirate Xaaron, in the drop of an optic shutter, is right there and… oh. Oh, dear. Asking about that unsavoury little backup plan the constable has been trying not to bring up for fear of… well, this, pretty much. He didn't want Emirate Xaaron to worry about that along with every other concern that so troubles him and now it's gone and backfired.

Then Emirate Xaaron asks, and Swerve can't lie. Not ever, and especially not to him. For once, Swerve wishes he could make himself lie if only it would comfort his leader.

"O-only if I had to," he answers, unnerved slightly by the unfamiliar tone to this proximity and by Emirate Xaaron's almost frantic cast. "If the Decepticons only wanted to take one of us, say, or fuel restrictions, or…." He would, he'd do it in an instant if it was necessary, knowing full well the Prime would bring him to ruin. The thought even scared him at one point, when he first realised he was willing to go to such lengths. Not so much any more, but… oh, he hadn't thought of what it would do to the very person he'd be trying to protect. That thought brings fear anew to his spark. He's a blasted fool, is Swerve. "I… I'm sorry, sir," comes the earnest murmur, dimmed gold optics downcast in shame. Too single-minded. "The consequences… didn't occur to me." He's screwed up again.

[Kup]

Kup lowers his arms and pushes against the wall to bring himself back to a fully upright position. 'Last resort' hadn't exactly been the way things had been put to him, but Kup, for one, is not complaining about apparent change. Better still, Swerve finally does seem to be reconsidering that fool plan of his.

Kup had suspected that if anyone could talk him out of it, Emirate Xaaron could.

He looks at the two, then comes to a decision. Information is important, but there are some things more important. "I can come back later, if you'd like," he offers, voice low.

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

"I'm sure the Decepticons would take you," Emirate Xaaron reassures, as much to comfort Swerve as it is to comfort himself. "You're a good fighter, a fair hand at repairs, and you're such a fine, upstanding person. I don't see how they could refuse you," and if the Decepticons were only going to take one, it had better be Swerve, slaggit.

Then, his voice cracks, and he forces himself to say, because Swerve clearly wasn't thinking about the consequences and needs to know them, "Swerve, he would break you and remake you, and if you didn't kill me yourself while he watched and laughed, I would have to live with your fall from grace on my hands, and I honestly don't know what would be worse!"

He covers his face in his hands and shakes, nodding mutely to Kup. Emirate Xaaron drops his hands and concludes, voice pained at having caused Swerve such distress, "But please, don't beat yourself up over this. I know, you just had the best in mind for me, but it can't possibly do me any good if hurts you. Remember that."

[Swerve-3]

Still not quite able to meet Emirate Xaaron's gaze, Swerve listens nonetheless, nodding acquiescence. He really needs to work on his impulsiveness. It's only ever gotten him into trouble in the past and things won't be changing any time soon at the rate he's going. Worse, he's put Emirate Xaaron at risk once already and might've done so again.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs again, looking up at last, lifting one hand as if to rest it reassuringly on Emirate Xaaron's shoulder while he trembles but stopping himself before even a single fingertip can brush the golden plating. Quashing the guilty expression trying to knit itself into his features, he lowers his hand again, hopefully before Emirate Xaaron spots it and recoils; much as he wants to comfort, he always has to remind himself that Emirate Xaaron dislikes contact, especially when it's someone else touching him. Instead, he offers his leader a thin, winsome sort of smile, the kind that makes it painfully clear he's trying to smile even when he isn't entirely sure he feels like it. In many ways, there's no-one who can beat up Swerve more than he does himself. "…I'll remember, sir," he says, sincere but almost too softly to be heard.

What Kup leaving would accomplish is beyond the constable; Swerve has nothing but his words and reassurances to offer Emirate Xaaron – which he's done so fervently on more than one occasion – and he's already interrupted the discussion. He starts as if to say something, then stops, giving Kup an apologetic wince.

[Kup]

Between Emirate Xaaron's nod and Swerve's wince, Kup decides it's best to afford the two some privacy for awhile.

"All right, then," he says softly. He looks at Emirate Xaaron. "Whenever you think you're ready to try again, I'll be right outside." And with that, he turns and exits the room, closing the door gently behind him.

---

OOC: Skippable.

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

Emirate Xaaron does notice that aborted reach, but he doesn't recoil. Swerve notices, and Swerve remembers. That alone does much to reassure Emirate Xaaron, that show of considerate thoughtfulness, and he wishes that he wasn't so broken, that he could tolerate something so simple without forcing himself, that he could perhaps comfort Swerve back.

He gushes, "Oh Swerve, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry to make you feel bad, and I'm sorry for everything, really. Please, can you promise me one thing?" he pauses, steeling himself. "If it comes down to you or me, get yourself out of there. I know you feel that you have a duty to protect me, but you still have a chance to make a difference. I've had my shot and blown it."

Emirate Xaaron really means it. He is a coward, and he doesn't want to die right now, but he has to stand for something, has to have some issue he won't budge on, or he really is a sorry piece of nothing. He's been there, cringing and crying, and he doesn't want to be there anymore.

He starts to say something else, "Swerve, I-" then he cuts himself off, and he looks over at the door, "-I'm going to finish my talk with Kup." It's pretty clearly not what he was about to say, whatever it was.

Emirate Xaaron is yet too much of a coward, to scarred by the damage done, and he heads for the door, afraid even to hear Swerve's response.

[Swerve-3]

How to make Emirate Xaaron understand that Swerve blames him for nothing? That he has nothing he should apologise for? What more can Swerve possibly say to reassure him when the constable has only so many words to offer and they're already running thin? And how can Swerve admit that making the promise Emirate Xaaron asks of him leaves a bitter taste in his mouth?

He can't, really. He's as much a coward in this as Emirate Xaaron; unable to say no, too afraid to do anything that might upset his leader any more than he's already managed to do.

"…I… I promise," he finally mumbles only after Emirate Xaaron is halfway to the door, low and choked, forcing the words out despite every fiberoptic cable in his body screaming at him not to say it. He's given his word – awful as it is – and it hangs over him, heavy and grim. Can he really keep a vow to abandon someone so clearly in need of protection?

Something to think about – something that isn't what Emirate Xaaron might have said to him – he decides, wordlessly excusing himself and slipping past leader and security chief. He can't really bring himself to care if he has an escort this time; he needs a little space and open air to think.

---

OOC: Out of thread.

[Kup]

Kup had gone to wait in the hallway for the others, but even so, he's a little surprised with how quickly it goes. He straightens as Emirate Xaaron steps out of the room. "Well, all right," he says. Then looks down the hall, towards the lounge opposite the spiraling ramp. "Shall we head over someplace a bit comfortable?"

Then Swerve slips past the both of them, eliciting a thoughtful frown from Kup. He'd love to give the boy his space right now - he really would. But it's just not a good idea to let him wander about alone, either for the Autobots' safety, or for Swerve's. While waiting for an answer from the Emirate, he activates his radio.

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

Emirate Xaaron bites into his lip, hard, at Swerve's answer. What he just asked of Swerve hurt Swerve, and he cannot be forgiven for it. The can be no absolution for him - when Unicron comes, perhaps he will not die and end his pain. Perhaps, instead, he will live and, in living, know that he is unworthy of a clean, painless death, for all his failures, but mostly for the pain he caused that dear red car.

He favours Kup with a cringe. Kup doesn't it mean it that way, but he's at a loss for how Kup does mean it, and so he simply asks plaintively, "Wh-what do you mean?"

[Kup]

Kup sighs, shakes his head, and looks at the ceiling. Then he tilts his body to gesture towards the lounge. "D'you wanna go sit down to talk, maybe get something to drink, or just stand here in the slagging hallway?" he snaps, annoyed.

It may seem strange to offer more energon to someone who is suffering a hangover from over-energization, but that's really how over-energization works. When excess energon enters the system beyond what can be stored, it gets processed immediately, leading to increased heat output and circuitry running over current and over voltage. Meanwhile, the increase in heat causes mental facilities to degrade, leading to the 'drunk' effect exhibited by most Transformers in that state. In other words, they've got too much energy, and aren't thinking straight. Eventually, the excess energy gets burned off, the system stops overheating, and the internal repair systems set about fixing the damage caused. These repair systems use more energy than normal operation, and so some Transformers, after 'sleeping it off,' will wake up in a miserable, energy-depleted state with internal repairs that may or may not be completed. The fastest way to cure this condition is by injecting more energon into the system, although in more careful amounts.

In other words, for Transformers, the best cure for a hangover really is the 'hair of the dog,' so to speak.

[Emirate Xaaron-3]

Emirate Xaaron winces, folding in on himself, at Kup's annoyed snap. He nervously plays with his hands, thinking about his options. Going somewhere to sit down increases their privacy and decreases their chances of being intruded upon, but it also increases the chances that Kup could kill him. Kup killing him a lot possibility, but it is there, all the same. A hallway is more public, and if Kup does anything, it it more likely to be seen, but they also cannot talk about as sensitive manners. Some energon would be nice, but it might be poisoned or drugged - drugged in a way he doesn't find amusing.

Emirate Xaaron sees the world through cracked black glass.

He sighs, and he looks up. That in and of itself is peculiar - Kup may have noticed those of Emirate Xaaron's reality, particularly Nightbeat, looking down when they do 'give me strength' gestures. Emirate Xaaron suggests, "I could use a little energon, and then perhaps we could go somewhere to sit."