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Post by Mirage on Feb 17, 2012 23:52:24 GMT -5
Addison's pace slows to one that makes conversation a bit easier. Again, he takes several moments to speak again.
"Why would you want to? You owe me nothing. And whatever... this is it shouldn't have affected you past my leaving."
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 18, 2012 10:43:17 GMT -5
Rodney looks absolutely baffled. "Erm... because I do still care about you, even when you're not in the immediate area. And you seemed upset."
This is definitely an understatement.
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Post by Mirage on Feb 18, 2012 11:11:03 GMT -5
Which part is the understatement, though, that Rodney cares, or that Addison seemed upset?
They come to the end of another block and Addison presses the crosswalk button. He places one hand against the pole and leans against it. Finally, he actually looks over at Rodney.
"Rodney, I care about you as well. Deeply. Do you really not understand why I might be upset about this... revelation? That you like me better at the moment because of some quirk of genetic circumstance?"
"Beyond that, you know how strong my sense of honor is; that remains unchanged regardless of my form. The memories of Addison Payne may be false, but the emotions are very real. I have an entire lifetime of relationships that are called into question now, where I must wonder if I ever unwittingly forced someone to my company when they would not otherwise have chosen it."
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 18, 2012 14:05:59 GMT -5
Rodney considers. "I suppose I can see how you might be upset, but... I don't think it would have been better not to know." The light changes, and the 'walking man' picture lights up. Rodney only crosses, however, if Addison is walking alongside him. "Ignorance might be bliss, but that doesn't make it right."
Then he shakes his head. "I really don't know how to react to your false memories, though. I'm sorry, Mirage," did he slip? "but that entire lifetime of relationships was already in question. No, you never forced anyone into your company because none of that happened."
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Post by Mirage on Feb 19, 2012 0:56:39 GMT -5
Addison does indeed walk with Rodney. "Of course I would want to know! The last thing I want is-." He breaks off and turns his gaze straight ahead once more.
"Intellectually knowing those things didn't happen to me personally is one thing. But were you to talk to, oh say, the vapid young actress from the first two movies, the one that they cut for this one, she would certainly remember it happening. Just like you've been one of the primary effects experts for all three movies."
"This," he waves his hand, "is so complicated for me. Like I said, the emotions are real. I can't fully separate myself from this human seeming. Maybe... maybe if I'd been made into something on the other spectrum, a dock worker or some other laborer, it would be easier."
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 19, 2012 17:24:35 GMT -5
Rodney eyes Addison from the edge of the visual field, not turning his head completely to look at him. He bites back the temptation to say, 'Right, if you'd been made something "beneath" you,' because he's fairly sure the other didn't intend it to come out like that. And yet.
"I'm on the credits, and when I look my name up on the internet, I can find other things I'm supposed to have done, but..." he shrugs. "I don't remember any of it. I can look up the names of my supposed parents, but... not much else about them, like they don't really exist. Whatever did this seems to have had more trouble fitting me in."
Then he glances at Addison again. "And if we find a way to reverse this... is that going to be a problem for you?" Not that it would stop Rodney, but it's useful to be prepared.
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Post by Mirage on Feb 19, 2012 21:20:36 GMT -5
"Your special charge likely has something to do with the difficulty," Addison observes, "You were already re-made once higher powers. I imagine it would be hard to do it so fully a second time."
He stops, startled by Rodney's question. Addison shakes his head sharply in negation.
"Primus, no, Rodimus. I want to be back in my proper form. I may not be able to be as blase about my situation as you seem to want me to be, but I damn sure do not want to live out my life in such a fragile seeming."
Addison sighs and runs his fingers through his dark hair. "There are just... aspects of this life I wish were more fact that fiction, is all."
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 19, 2012 22:55:16 GMT -5
Rodney reaches up and attempts to place a hand on Addison's arm as they walk. "I'm... I'm sorry," he says. There's little else he can say. He really isn't in a position to understand. Someone like, say, Kate might be, but at this point, Rodney suspects putting those two in the same room unless absolutely necessary would not be the smartest move.
He walks along the other in silence for a little longer, then asks, "Is there... anything I can do?" Addison may really just want some time alone, and Rodney is willing to give him that, but after the way he had left, Rodney just needed to make sure he was... as okay as can be expected, under the circumstance.
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Post by Mirage on Feb 19, 2012 23:25:18 GMT -5
Kate might well deck Addison the next time she sees him, so no, putting them together wouldn't be for the best. Besides, Mirage has always had trouble when he actually tries to explain himself and his feelings to others. It never works out the way he thinks it should.
He allows the touch on his arm and reaches up to try and cover Rodney's hand with his own. Addison's lips twitch up in a sad half-smile. He doesn't really want to be alone. He wants to ask Rodney to stay the night with him, not for any sort of sexual encounter, but just to be with him, and to be held. But to ask that now would seem the basest attempt at manipulation possible.
"Nothing that I can in good conscience ask of you," he says softly.
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 20, 2012 18:57:29 GMT -5
Rodney hesitates a little, wanting... even eager to... ask Addison what he means, to push Addison to let Rodney help him.
And that eagerness is probably why he shouldn't.
Rodney nods, smiling just faintly. "I... understand."
He pauses a moment.
"See you tomorrow at work?"
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Post by Mirage on Feb 21, 2012 2:02:55 GMT -5
Addison gives Rodney's hand a squeeze. "Yes, of course." His smile widens slightly. "I'll see about getting us opera tickets for next weekend. I believe the local troupe is performing Carmen at the moment."
He then tries to turn into Rodney and give him a tight hug. "Thank you," he murmurs.
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 21, 2012 15:13:23 GMT -5
Rodney winces slightly at the mention of opera tickets. In fact, he's doing good to keep it as unnoticeable as he manages. Then he smiles and nods, returning the hug. "You're welcome," he says softly.
When he pulls away, he adds, "By the way, we're going to have to talk about that cousin of yours at some point. I.. think he might have the same thing going for him. About the... the..." Rodney waves his hand absently. 'Magic Sexy Field' is really an awkward term!
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Post by Mirage on Feb 22, 2012 0:02:24 GMT -5
Addison chuckles softly and tries to place his hand on Rodney's cheek. "It will not be nearly do bad as you think. I wager you'll dislike the tuxedo more than the show."
The model frowns at the mention of his cousin. "Fletcher? I suppose it is possible. You still haven't placed him, have you?"
He shrugs a shoulder, "At any rate, Lynn keeps insisting we're descended from some magical creature, and well... I will admit that I have memories of such family stories. I suppose a blood test would reveal quite a bit along those lines."
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Post by Rodimus Prime on Feb 22, 2012 19:41:30 GMT -5
Rodney allows the hand on his cheek. "Saying I'll like something more than wearing a tux isn't really saying much in its favor!" he protests. Then he shakes his head. "No. I know he's Cybertronian, but... I'm not even sure if he's 'Bot." The young man frowns slightly.
"My abilities aren't really that precise."
At Addisons's mention of a blood test, he blinks. "They have 'magic creature' DNA on file?" he asks. That would be... pretty strange, but Rodney guesses it's not outside of the realm of possibility.
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Post by Mirage on Feb 22, 2012 22:59:52 GMT -5
Addison steps back, slipping his hands back into his pockets as he does so. One, it is a bit chilly here to him, and two, if he puts his hands in his pockets, he won't be tempted to keep touching Rodney. Addison shrugs again.
"Lynn's been a bit relentless about the idea. Apparently, not long ago fae were classified as a small ethnic group all there own, one with a very specific set of meta powers that ran in a specific family lines and bred true*. She also says I don't taste human, and the only part of me she's tasted is my blood, so...." He shrugs again.
"Fletcher is another matter. He's from the less savory side of the Payne family, and it's only been in recent generations that the sides were on speaking terms. He's never done anything to make me distrust him...."
"But again, we are talking false memories. I can have a discussion with him, if you like?"
*yes, this is the official DZ explanation for fae. Mention of Lynn w/ permission.
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